Chapter-14
-- The Great MacFin --
(An English Crumpet Western)
ACT II
$SCENE I
[In front of MacFin's Ranch House]
[Enter Langstorm, and Bud bearing a torch before him]
Langstorm
How goes the night, boy?Bud
The moon is down; but I have not heard the bell.Langstorm
The Ol' wife probably goes to bed at twelve.Bud
Probably 'tis later, sir.Langstorm
Well, take m'six-shooter for protection, Their candles are all out, now.[Langstorm give his knife to Bud]
Take that too.
I am very sleepy, And yet I can't sleep: m'mind keeps a'thinking cursed thoughts
[Enter MacFin, and a Cowboy with a torch]
Quick! Give me m'six-shooter.
Who's there?
MacFin
Only A friend ... m'friend!Langstorm
How come your not yet in a bed?Well the Owner's a-bed: He was unusually happy tonight and sent a "keg" to Cooky.
... I see that He liked talking to your wife.
MacFin
We did what we could, to make the Owner content.Langstorm
Now all's well. I dreamt last night aboot those three weird cowpokes we'd seen on the trail. They shore spoke the truth, 'bout you.MacFin
I don't wanna think of them: Unless we have some time to waste ... and you really do wann'a talk 'bout it.Langstorm
Whatever you say, MacFin.MacFin
But listen ... I have some special plans, here. and if you say that your on m'side, and with me, I'll make it worth you while.Langstorm
Well now, MacFin you know That depends, I'm not aboot to get into do'un sumpth'un illegal. If you agree to this I'll listen to you.MacFin
Good answer ... and Good night!Langstorm
Thanks, MacFin ... and the likes to you![They All Git Out Langstorm and Bud]
MacFin [to a cowboy]
Go git m'wife, when m'drink is ready, Just knock on her door. Then git thee to your own bed.[Exit Cowboy]
[MacFin see a vision of a dagger]
Wo ... Is this an airy-dagger which I see before me? Its handle toward m'hand? Come, let me clutch you ... Oh! But I can't grab it! Is this one of those spooky things, Perhaps, proceeding from m'feavered brain, Is it showing me the instrument-I am to use?
Mine eyes are making fools of m'other senses, And on its blade I see lots of blots of blood, Which were not there before.
Oh' I know tis's no such thing and it is only this bloody business which confuses me ... Wo ... It moves like a ghost.
But while's I talk, he still lives! Enough of Words, and on into the heat of the deed and finally ... cold breath.
[The midnight bell rings]
I go, and it is done; the bell invites me. Hear it not, Owner, for it is a death-knell That summons thee to heaven ... or to hell.
[Exit]
-- The Great MacFin --
(An English Crumpet Western)ACT II
$SCENE II
[The Same Place][Enter LADY MacFin]
LADY MacFin
Hick! ... oops! That which hath made them drunk hath also made me bold; and What hath quench'd them ... hath given me a bit of fire.What that? Was that an owl that shriek'd, or was it that fatal deed ... done?
I have drugg'd the Owner's friends and placed their daggers in convenient reach for MacFin.
MacFin [Within]
Who's there? what, ho!LADY MacFin
Oh no, I am afraid they have awaked, And the deed 'tis *not* done. It looks like we can only talk but can't act ... Then this deed Confounds us, still.I know I laid their daggers at ready; He couldn't have missed 'em.
Had the Owner not looked like m'Pa, as he slept-then I would had done't m'self.
[Enter MacFin]
M'husband!
MacFin
I have done the deed. Didst thou not hear a noise?LADY MacFin
I heard the owl scream and the crickets cry. Was that you?MacFin
When?LADY MacFin
Now, dip-stick!MacFin
Just now, As I descended?LADY MacFin
Che-e-e-e-s ... Yes!MacFin
This is a sorry sight.[Looking on his hands]
LADY MacFin
Me think Its too late to say, "a sorry sight."MacFin
There were two!One of them did laugh in his sleep, and one cried 'M*u*r*d*e*r!' and they woke each other: I stood there and heard them:
LADY MacFin
Well, they were both in the same room.MacFin
Then one cried 'b*l*e*s*s u*s!' and the other said, 'A*m*e*n'; When they saw me standing there with these hangman's hands.I could not say 'Amen,' when they said 'God bless us!'
LADY MacFin
Don't worry aboot it.MacFin
But why couldn't I say 'Amen'? I had most need of blessing, and 'Amen' --but these words Stuck in m'throat.LADY MacFin
Nevermind, We can't think aboot it, now, or what has happened, or we'll go crazy.MacFin
When it was over, M'thought I heard a voice cry, 'Sleep no more MacFin, the m*u*r*d*e*r, like the innocent sleep,Oh' for Sleep-that knits the ravell'd sleeve of care, at The end of each day's life, sore from labour's wear, Balm for hurt minds, it gives nature a second chance, and nourishes for life's next day's dance.
LADY MacFin
What do you mean?MacFin
Still it cried 'Sleep no more!' to all this house: "MacFin hath murder'd sleep, and therefore, like Cowfish, He Shall sleep no more-The Great MacFin shall sleep no more.LADY MacFin
Who, in Gawd's name said that? Don't lose your mind MacFin, and think such crazy thoughts.Now Go get some water, And wash the bloody stains from your hands.
Wait ... Why d'you bring these daggers here? You should have left them in their bunks: Now go carry them back; and smear Those sleepy cowboys with their blood.
MacFin
No! No! I can't move: I am afraid to think what I have done; You do it ... I can't.LADY MacFin
You've lost it, MacFin! Give me the daggers: they're not a-sleeping, they're dead ... drunkYou're just having a childish nightmare that fears the monster.
I'll paint the faces of the Owner's cowboys with his blood; For it must point to their guilt.
[Exit. Knocking within]
MacFin
Who is that a knocking? How is't that every noise makes me jump?[MacFin glances down at his bloody hands]
Whose hands are these? Hah! Are they there to pluck out mine eyes? Can all of great Neptune's oceans washout this blood and clean m'hands?
No, these hands would turn the oceans red Making each blue sea turn ... r*e*d.
[Re-enter LADY MacFin]
LADY MacFin
Now m'hands are like yours; but it has also-got to me. I shame to wear a heart so white.[Knocking within]
I hear a knocking Let's git to our bed. You forgit our plan. Not to worry, water will easily clean our hands.
[Knocking within]
Listen! I hear more knocking. Get on your nightgown, so we look like we've been to a bed, Don't worry aboot what happened.
MacFin
I know m'deed ... 'I just wish I didn't know m'self.[Knocking within]
I would Wake the Owner with this knocking, if I could!
[They All Git Out]
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